Thursday, March 4, 2021

Playlist/播放列表: 5 Stages - Acceptance

Updated: 04/03/2021
Removed a song and added "Moral of the Story" - Ashe

Acceptance (接受)

Let Her Go - Passenger
还是要幸福 - 田馥甄
我很好, 那么你呢? - 王心凌
那些女孩教我的事 - 品冠
Already Gone - Kelly Clarkson
爱的代价 - 张艾嘉
开始懂了 - 孙燕姿
Always Remember Us This Way - Lady Gaga
我好吗 - 梁静茹
Moral of the Story - Ashe
如果这就是爱情 - 张靓颖

Acceptance in any way shape of form.
It could be bittersweet, could be liberating, could even be taking a deep breath.
It could be smiling, while crying, with snot running down your nose.

Truth is, you don’t really need a playlist for acceptance.

Acceptance is when you can listen to any of the songs in the playlists before, and maintain composure.
Maybe there is a hint of regret, a sight bitterness.

Remember, happiness is a choice.

Youtube Playlist

Tuesday, March 2, 2021


He brought along one of those smaller beer cans, ones that could fit into a soda sleeve.

Despite it being a good sunny day, the wind was still blowing strong, doubly so where we are. The ice, now broken up into large pieces by the warming weather, is moving along with the current. Two birds stood on top of one of the pieces, seemingly enjoying the trip they are on.

"There are 3 women I've ever loved in my life."

"Yeah?" I took a sip from my own can.

"All of them different from each other, and I love them all with my heart"

"What changed?"

He looked away onto the lake. Deep in thought. The sunset was happening on the horizon, half obstructed by the giant structure to our right. I could see partially the beauty of it through the chimney stacks and steel walls, piecing it together with the reflection of it on the lake.

There was suddenly beams of light coming towards us. How the police manage to drive their car onto a walkway near the water will always allude me. I guess... very slowly?

I shifted my can behind my backpack. It's always the small details that give it away, and I was not planning to get a ticket.

"So... then are you still in contact with the other two?"

"No. No... Heck no."


"I wouldn't be able to control myself."


Saturday, February 20, 2021


"But I met someone. And she's helped. And now I want to stay clean. And shit! Maybe that's... Maybe that's me being selfish. And Ali just scared the shit out of me because he told me that it wasn't gonna last. And, fuck, you know what? Maybe you're right. But I really, really, really, hope you're wrong."

- Rue (Euphoria / '03 Bonnie and Clyde)


"Everything that's good to you ain't always good for you."

- Waiter (Euphoria / Trouble Don't Last Always)


"I can survive just fine without you, you know. But...  there’s a chance that life can be a little less mundane with you in it."


"OK, come on. Let's see if we blow up and die."

- Sarah (Palm Springs)


"Closure is really for you you know. There isn't anything on the line for the other person."

- Some jackass I know

Sunday, February 14, 2021


 Looking out the window, people at the skating rink are leaving. It is getting late, isn't it.

A thought suddenly pops into his head... huh that's weird. Why is this thought suddenly coming up, and why is there an urge to speak it.

Throughout the night there's been a lot of conversations going on, a lot of talking, a lot of understanding and heartfelt feelings.

It's beginning to turn into a word vomit, like something you can't stop any longer.

He looked down at the bowl of pomelo, at the can of beer that's been consumed.

Rationally, there's absolutely no reason why this needs to come up now. There is a plan for everything... there's a plan.


What is a plan?


Heart pounding now.

He looked up, looks at her, and said: "I still like you."

Monday, February 8, 2021

后来的我们 / Us & Them

I never thought to watch this movie when it first came out. Though because of Hebe Tien (田馥甄)'s song in the OST that I already knew about this film. I believe it was Netflix's first distribution of a film made in China.

Though this was before I saw who directed this film. Rene Liu (刘若英), and this is her directorial debut. If that name rings any bell, she sang a lot (read a lot) of ballads in the late 90s and early 2000s that are must sings in the KTV. Particularly this song 后来.

I mean, I got 2 hours to burn.

The entire film is split into two parts, the flashback sequences, which were set in the 90s, and the present year set in 2018.

It follows two people. Lin Jianqing (played by Jing Boran 井柏然) and Xiaoxiao Fang (played by Zhou Dongyu 周冬雨) as they make their way to Beijing from their fictional hometown of Yaojiang Town. Though from the looks of the setting, looks to be up north east (东北). 

Curiously, it is the flashback that is in color, while the present is presented in B&W. Like... what's happening in the present is something that shouldn't have happened, a dream, a sidestory, a forgotten part.

The main actors play both their young and old characters, but just from the basis of their actual age, are more natural in the flashbacks than their "old" counterparts. The "old" taps into their acting chops and present a more mature, more practical part of their lives.

Special shoutout goes out to the father of the Jianqing, played by Zhuangzhuang Tian). He does not have many scenes in the movie, though that final scene will tug at your heart strings.


These two lines from the film:



 Netflix Translation:

"If you didn't leave at that time, would it make any difference to our relationship?"

"If at that time, you had the courage to get on the subway train, I would've stayed with you forever."

When I first heard that, I didn't read too much into it. It just sounded like regrets on top of regrets, a load of "What-ifs".

Later while listening to Eason Chen's main title song: 我们 that I saw the following YouTube comment, and everything clicked into place.


Self Translate: 

"This might be the difference between man and woman: While you are happy and contented, I have nothing. I really do not have the courage to get on that train, afraid you will follow me and live a terrible life; Meanwhile, she wants to see the attitude and determination in him, hope that he love without any doubts or fear. Hence, if you make this step and get on the subway train, I will follow you for the rest of our lives."