感情

Men and women.

Everytime when I think I understand relationships, I get hit a hardball and go back to the drawing board. Somehow, I believe that women and men need each other more than they think they do. Not that women need men more or men need women more. On a pure relationship level (aka no sexual relations & monetary concerns), I think everyone of us just wants company, someone that goes deeper than friends.... 陪伴. 有人陪伴着, 分享着不快乐与快乐的事情. Though it definitely gets more complicated when all of those are involved (uh duh). I also believe that there are times where we need to be alone to think, to brood over past thoughts, take stock of our life, what went wrong and where to go from that point onwards.

What exactly constitutes a working relationship? I have yet to discover that answer for myself. Coming from me, my family, all the past relationships I have had, I can't see past all the smoke and mirrors. I however, saw some of that around me, friends who have been dating for a long time. Though then, how many of them are truly happy? 有多少的感情只剩下容忍, 那能容忍多久呢? Some answers came to me when I heard of friends breaking up. Even for myself... Yet, I had a shock when I saw one relationship that broke, one that I thought was going to last forever. Its weird considering how I remembered everything from 4 years ago that I did / didn't do. I wish each of them well.

新鸳鸯蝴蝶梦 - 黄安
由来只有新人笑
有谁听到旧人哭
爱情两个字 好辛苦
是要问一个明白
还是要装作糊涂
知多知少难知足


Yup, I'm definitely bitter. Still, I don't think I have given up relationships. I do believe that I have a better picture with each relationship I go through. With each relationship there is something that I could take away from. Hopefully, I'll complete the picture soon enough.
_______________________________

I discovered this after watching Scrubs, Season 5 Episode 13 "My Five Stages". Something that I actually find to be true (at least for me). Depression, Acceptance.

I've just realized that I'm not anywhere close to that.