Wait, is there still light out? He looked at his watch, 8:30, there's still time perhaps.
Updating his destination, he started driving.
________
It was already very dark when he got there, almost.
He walked up the hill, he didn't expect there to be the overgrown trees, though to be fair the last time he was here was in winter.
At the spot where he took the last picture, this time there's more people, with drinks and music.
He misses the peace and quiet, but definitely not the cold.
Still, he found a spot and sat down.
He had missed it. Though the city lights are starting to make up for it, a different scene than what he expected to see.
_________
Walking back down the hill, some mini fireworks started from up top. Seems like the people are compensating for the lack of real fireworks. The sound reflects from across the valley, seemingly doubling the amount that's actually there.
I can see you standing, honey With his arms around your body Laughin', but the joke's not funny at all And it took you five whole minutes To pack us up and leave me with it Holdin' all this love out here in the hall
亲爱的，我看的见你站在那里
他的手搂在你身上
笑着跟本不好笑的笑话
你只花了五分钟的时间
结束了我们，留下我一个人
在走廊里守护这余温 ____________________
I think I've seen this film before And I didn't like the ending You're not my homeland anymore So what am I defending now You were my town Now I'm in exile, seein' you out I think I've seen this film before
Like he's just your understudy Like you'd get your knuckles bloody for me Second, third, and hundredth chances Balancin' on breaking branches Those eyes add insult to injury
亲爱的，我看你在盯着我们
好像他只是你的替补
好像你要为我把他打的遍体凌伤
一次又一次的机会
在断开的树枝上平衡
你现在的眼神只是雪上加霜
____________________
I think I've seen this film before And I didn't like the ending I'm not your problem anymore So who am I offending now You were my crown Now I'm in exile, seein' you out I think I've seen this film before So I'm leavin' out the side door
So step right out, there is no amount Of crying I can do for you All this time We always walked a very thin line You didn't even hear me out(You didn't even hear me out) You never gave a warning sign(I gave so many signs)
走就走吧，我没有办法 为你哭泣 一直以来 我们总是忐忑不定
要你听我说都不愿意（你连听都不愿意）
你从来没给我警示（我暗示了好多次）
____________________
All this time I never learned to read your mind(Never learned to read my mind) I couldn't turn things around(You never turned things around) 'Cause you never gave a warning sign(I gave so many signs) So many signs, so many signs You didn't even see the signs
Chase two girls, lose the one When you are young, they assume you know nothin'
若都是朋友就是没有知己 脚踏两船，得不到唯一 当你年轻时，他们都觉得你什么都不懂
_________________
But I knew you Playing hide-and-seek and giving me your weekends, I I knew you Your heartbeat on the high line, once in 20 lifetimes, I
但我懂你 一起玩捉迷藏，于我共度每个周末 我懂你 你的心从未如此悸动，是20个来生里第一次
_________________
To kiss in cars and downtown bars was all we needed You drew stars around my scars But now I'm bleedin'
其实我们只求于在车里，酒吧里接吻 你曾在我的伤疤周围点缀闪亮星星 如今我却还是心如刀割
_________________
'Cause I knew you Steppin' on the last train, Marked me like a bloodstain, I I knew you Tried to change the ending, Peter losing Wendy, I I knew you Leavin' like a father, running like water, I And when you are young, they assume you know nothing
But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs The smell of smoke would hang around this long 'Cause I knew everything when I was young
I knew I'd curse you for the longest time Chasin' shadows in the grocery line I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired And you'd be standin' in my front porch light And I knew you'd come back to me You'd come back to me And you'd come back to me And you'd come back
And when I felt like I was an old cardigan Under someone's bed You put me on and said I was your favorite
当我觉得自己是一件被人遗忘的旧毛衣 堆积在某人的床底下 你将我穿上，说我是的你的最爱
_________________
"Peter losing Wendy" refers to the story of Peter Pan.
I took some liberties at "Leavin' like a father, running like water" and pegged it to be of tears running, I've seen some versions where it refers to the father running away faster with the water.
I have never heard of Ashe until this song came on as part of YouTube's recommendation.
The lyrics are so personal that I was wondering if it was personal experience.
Turns out it was.
I'm not going to repeat what the video at the end is going to tell you, but this talks a lot about her journey and how she came about to write this song about her ex-husband.
Moral of the Story - Ashe
This song is produced by FINNEAS, as in, Billie Eilish's brother.
Side note: I've been identifying music producers/song writers that I vibe with, him and Ryan Tedder seem to be my jam.
Released on Valentine's Day 2019, it got mainstream only when the 2nd film in the "To All the Boys" trilogy featured it... one year later. I only watched the clip at which it was featured, I laughed, I think it's too young for the situation that this track is talking about.
A duet version with One Direction-er Niall Horan was released in June 2020, the 2nd verse is changed from the personal story about painting houses to something more contemporary.
I moved this song into the playlist I made for acceptance.
"Some mistakes get made
that's alright, that's okay
in the end it's better for me,
that's the moral of the story"
__________
I like to think that with her new duet with FINNEAS "Till Forever Falls Apart", she's moved on to a more optimistic portion of her life.
After I saw Minari, I told someone that I found it "generic".
I would like to take that statement back.
Minari is a 2020 film starring Steven Yuen, Han Ye-ri, Alan Kim, Noel Kate Cho, Youn Yuh-jung.
A Korean family that moved to Arkansas from California to start a new life, along with their daughter and son.
I see a dad trying his hardest to make something of himself. To have a new start. I see a mother trying desperately to keep their children safe and well. The clashes and fights that happen because of this. Hard to say, if there weren't any kids in the picture, if they would still be together.
I see a child trying to wrestle with his health, his bed wetting and his new grandma that came into his house.
It won "Best Picture - Foreign" at the Golden Globes.
Is it foreign because of the language that they were talking in?
Is it foreign because it features an Asian cast?
Detailing their trials and tribulations, their fight for the American Dream. Is that foreign?
_______
I found it generic... because I've seen it, I've heard it, hell, I lived through some of it.
Being so happy to the point of crying because of chilli powder? Been there with salt water popsicles. True story, I happily drove to a supermarket super out of the way to get that. Paid like 5x the cost. Best time ever.
A lot of the stand ups that feature immigrant comedians already covered these scenarios a lot. In my mind, I thought it was already well known. I realized then, perhaps the same as what I said in my writeup of The Farewell, people who understood the situation laughed because they could relate, people who didn't understand laughed because the situation described was just plain absurd to them.
What I realized... is that we downplay a lot of the experiences that we went through. We downplay them because people:
won't understand
can't relate
treat any experience that's out of the norm as foreign (and in turn weird, if not hostile)
The events of this week, the spa shootings and the subsequent coverage of said shootings, tells me that representation matters.
It's great that Minari is here this year, just as The Farewell was there 2 years ago. Stories, that are told, and shared, most importantly, recognized.
_______
Minari is also a vegetable that's also used in Korean cooking. Known for its resiliency, and its ability to adapt and grow.
Fitting that it is worked into the film and used as the title.